When the last bastion of civilization enshrines it, you know something’s up. That’s right. The Official Scrabble Players Dictionary has added “spam” to its list of acceptable words. It seems others appreciate spam as well.

J. Nathan Matias: “Spam is sometimes a beautiful thing, introducing me to intriguing new topics… Today, the spam read:


Subject: Want to make love like crazy?

Message: A true witness delivereth souls but a deceitful witness speaketh lies. The wicked desireth the net of evil men but the root of the righteous yieldeth fruit. To give subtilty to the simple, to the young man knowledge and discretion.

A wise son heareth his father’s instruction but a scorner heareth not rebuke.

“Life constantly surprises me.”

Barry Dennis pines for it: “My spam is important to me. In this new age of the Internet, I need the information and opportunities that e-mail marketing provides. The Internet is a new marketing channel, an information research assistant, and a replacement for some of those mail-order catalogs I used to request. And man, the response time!”

Jason Lefokowitz plays with subject lines:
Line: I have a secret, someone likes you.
Response: Yes, judging by the evidence, that?s a fairly well-kept secret!
Line: Are you a junky?
Response: If I was, would I need you to tell me?
Line: Can I make it up to you?
Response: No.

Low Grade Panic enjoys those wacky word combos aimed at busting spam filters, like “swizzle propane”, “entreaty polyphony” and the ever forgettable “As leave do flesh projectile”.

While we would love to join these folks prancing about the Maypole, we’d much rather smash, crush and mutilate the garbage that threatens intelligent communication.

Is that so wrong?

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